Awareness

12 Step Jedi Awareness, Mindfulness

“You will know when you are at peace, calm, passive…” – Yoda

 

Mindfulness is defined as “The practice of maintaining a nonjudgmental state of heightened or complete awareness of one’s thoughts, emotions, or experiences on a moment-to-moment basis.” Mindfulness is the practice of being present in the here and now. In other words being mentally right here in this present moment as you read these words.

The journey into a philosophy for life begins with awareness of the ability to analyze our own existence. Awareness is nothing more than knowledge and mindfulness of ones personal thoughts, biases, beliefs, feelings and place in time and space. Consciousness of self is awareness of ones inner existence and the effect the self exerts on the world.

A Jedi has acute awareness. She will sense every quiver, every sensation and emotion in her body without reacting to it. She will allow distracting thoughts to pass like clouds without engaging them. A Jedi is completely aware of what is happening inside and outside of her with each passing breath. The Jedi is aware and focused in the present moment without concern for the past or future. A Jedi uses observation, reason and objectivity in becoming aware of a situation and determining a course of action and when making a judgement.

When Obi-Wan Kenobi sat meditating before he fought Darth Maul he was clearing his mind of all distracting thoughts and emotions. Luke cleared his mind of all doubts and fears before taking the fatal shot that destroyed the Death Star.  The Jedi relied on awareness to connect with the Force and harness the presence and power to accomplish their goals.

Awareness practiced as mindfulness is no mystery. In fact it is part of our natural makeup. The Eastern and Western philosophies and spiritual traditions have advocated mindfulness and the power of living in the Now for millennia. Despite this we are led to believe that we require rigorous mental training with the aid of instructors, gurus, books and apps.  Nothing could be further from the truth. All you need to do is start.

Being aware is being fully engaged in life. It is taking time to smell the roses, appreciate the sun on your face, the wind in your hair. It is stopping to pet the cat you encounter on the street. Being aware is acknowledging your thoughts and emotions but allowing neither to dictate your reasoned actions.

Meditation is a mindfulness exercise. You can practice mindfulness anywhere, anytime. Being fully aware while driving a car, brushing the dog, washing the dishes, listening to music, playing with the kids and in fact doing just about any activity is an exercise in mindfulness. It is simply paying attention to what you are doing.

Commit your mind to the task with intent. If you are washing the dishes you are only washing the dishes and nothing else. Feel the water on your hands, the hardness of the porcelain and cutlery. Hear the sounds it makes. Use all of your senses. When you eat an apple experience the apple, observe its shape and color, notice the taste and texture as you bite in to it.

When you enter a room stop to look around. If there are people in the room take the time to notice them. Form a general impression from your surroundings wherever you go. Never blunder along with your face buried in a smart phone oblivious to what is happening around you. This is an all too common sight in society today. People are barely aware they are alive.

When you sit, allow mental intrusions to pass without engaging them. You can focus on the breath, the rise and fall of your chest or abdomen. If thoughts distract you, simply return to the breath.

There is a saying that when an old man sits, he only sits, there is nothing else going on; this is the essence of mindfulness.

Routine

12 Step Jedi Commitment, Training, Uncategorized

“So you want to be a Jedi” – Yoda

“Do. Or do not. There is not try” – Yoda

 

So you want to be a Jedi?

Life is hard and so is being Jedi. The Jedi Code, doing daily practices, applying principles and proactively working on self-improvement all take effort. Change was never meant to be easy. It can be damn hard. Sometimes it can take everything you have.

 

“But he still has much to learn. And his abilities have made him…well… arrogant. I realise now what you and Master Yoda knew from the beginning… the boy was to old to start the training” – Obi-wan Kenobi

 

The Jedi had a training program which included years of Temple Study in Lore, Ethics, History and Diplomacy as well as intense physical and martial arts training. There were long hours of meditation and Lightsaber practice. The Jedi student was assigned to a Jedi Knight who acted as mentor and teacher. The apprenticeship lasted until the Padawan was ready to be a Jedi.

There were dangerous trials the Jedi student had to pass. Rigorous training then continued between missions. The Jedi rose in rank as they demonstrated mastery and skill. A Jedi also knew that despite years of dedicated training they had not learned everything there was to know.

 

“I’m ready for the trials. I know I am! He knows it too. He believes I’m too unpredictable…Other Jedi my age have gone through the trials and made it..I know I started my training late… but he won’t let me move on.” – Anakin

 

Master self first..

Sometime we get ahead of ourselves and claim full knowledge and mastery before we are ready. We don’t know everything, and we never will. There is always more to learn, even the wisest and most experienced Jedi Master never stops learning. To claim “complete mastery” over any subject and announce that there is nothing more to learn is fool hardy at best, dangerous at worst.

So how do we approach our training? A good first step is to create and maintain a routine which will ensure that you stay on path in your journey to competency and after many decades, perhaps mastery.

 

Form Habits

This journal can serve as one small act done daily forming a routine and a habit. As a Jedi we should be doing our daily practices daily. This means every day, without fail, no excuses (unless you are too ill to move). We exercise, meditate, apply mindfulness in our interactions with the world, practice diplomacy and demonstrate self-discipline every day. Unless you incorporate the practices into some sort of routine you will fall well short of the mark.

Former US Navy SEAL Jocko Willinck has a daily routine that most people would find insane if not impossible. It  starts at 04:30 usually with a run and an intense workout. Willinck posts a photo of his watch to Instagram when he gets out of bed then sometime later there will be a photo of gym equipment or a sweat puddle on the floor.

“Real life Jedi” like Jocko Willink and David Goggins have realised that the secret to success and achieving goals is creating a routine and sticking to it no matter what. This take commitment, sacrifice and self discipline.  Hard work and an unbeatable mindset is built on a solid routine.

 

Routines

My daily routine is nothing like Jocko Willicks, its a simple one, but it does take effort. The benefits cannot be understated. Very often what we most need is a routine and a set of goals to work towards. The best way to set goals is to break them down. With simple and achievable targets that challenge you, you will progress. Over time you ratchet up the effort a little. Always start slow but be consistent and work to improve.

My daily routine comprises of practices I have adopted from the Jedi Path and the Stoics and adapted to my needs. Feel free to come up with your own program and stick to it for a while, then modify if required to suit your lifestyle, limitations and needs.

 

Morning

On rising, practice a short period of gratitude. Remind yourself of one or two or more things you are grateful for as you come into this day. Record them in the journal. This will put you on a good grounding. Avoid jumping straight on to your social media account to check missed posts and likes. Start with a fresh mind.

Welcome the day. A new day means new opportunity. Be thankful for it. Every morning try to greet the sunrise in its splendour. Otherwise take a quiet moment and imagine the sun coming up over the horizon. Take a moment to contemplate the grand scale of the cosmos and infinite time. Try to remember that this day is unique and will never be repeated. You only get one shot at it. You can take this time to meditate for 15-30 minutes if you prefer to meditate in the morning.

Spend a moment in contemplation. You can journal your thoughts on any topic or on the Jedi quote provided for the day. Grab a mental theme for the day. It can be anything taken from a quote, a line from a book or your own inspiration. Set in your mind or on paper three things you aim to achieve today and work towards it.

Consider the things that may go wrong. Remind yourself that through the day you will encounter people who are rude and obstinate, that your plans may get derailed. Tell yourself you will face obstacles and difficulties and how you react will reflect on you. Resolve not to let the things you cannot control affect you in negative ways.

 

During the Day

You will apply diplomacy and mindfulness throughout the day frequently checking in your inner world by simply asking yourself “How am I feeling right now? What am I thinking about?”.

Take time out from your responsibilities to simply focus on the breath. Go for a walk and notice things around you, the sky, trees, birds and people. Take the time to really notice the taste of your food and drink rather than scoffing it down mindlessly. Spend some time surrounded by nature each day, even its it’s only the local park. Enjoy a moment of solitude and silence if you can find it.

Do one act of kindness, a service, every day for someone. It can be anything, random or predetermined; an offer of assistance or help to someone struggling with a load, giving up your seat on the bus to someone who needs it more, a simple courtesy such as opening the door. A smile or kind word or an act of charity.

Deny yourself something nice or practice some form of denial to remind myself not to get too attached to comforts and ease. I practice periodic intermittent fasting on occasion. In addition to reminding myself that food is a precious resource not to be taken for granted I find that occasional fasting makes me feel better (Check with your Doctor before intermittent fasting). I may decide to leave my jacket at home on a cold day. Run the occasional cold shower! Sleep on the floor occasionally if you are adventurous.

Take a moment to undertake negative visualisation. Consider a realistic scenario that might occur which could ultimately change your life or at least make it unpleasant. This could include ill health, unemployment, poverty, ridicule or hate from others, betrayal by friends or colleagues. This should be done without attaching emotion. Imagine you are watching it play out in a movie. See yourself dealing with the situation and overcoming it; visualise yourself practising acceptance and equanimity.

Do at least 30 minutes of exercise or physical training (this can also be in the morning or evening). The type of physical training you do will vary and depend on your own preference and limitations. You may practice martial arts, play sports, hit the gym or CrossFit Box, swim, surf or run. Remember to have rest days to avoid over training (Stretch / Yoga on off days). However, do some form of physical activity every day even if it is only a short walk or some light stretching.

 

Evening

Spend at least 20 minutes in meditation (this can also be during the day or in the morning). Review the day, what went right, what went wrong and consider how you can improve. Journal your thoughts. Take some quiet time to relax and enjoy your free time any way you like. Thank the Force for another day.

 

“I want to be a Jedi, like my Father” – Luke Skywalker

 

Do you still want to be a Jedi?

Self Discipline is the key to a healthy and productive routine that achieves outcomes. The only person who is accountable to it is you. No one is going to force you to do this. There is no Jedi Knight pushing you to excel yourself. Yoda is not admonishing you to “Do. Or do not. There is no try“. You will have to be the one who does that.

When Jocko Willink would enter a debrief room to give orders for a mission his Team Members would hum the “Imperial March” from Star Wars. They knew the more satisfied Jocko looked  the tougher the mission was going to be. You wouldn’t want someone like Jocko Willink getting you out of bed to run 10 miles every at 04:30 every morning before a gruelling workout in the grinder would you? You know its going to hurt real bad. The next less painful way is for you to do it yourself.

 

 

Not every one can be as hard core as Willink or become a Jedi. You can still aim high but forget about achieving perfect practice. Perfection is an ideal. In the real world we can only do our best. There will be days you will skip the routine, days when you are too tired or don’t feel like it. These are the days that will best demonstrate where your commitment is and how far you have come on the journey. Every moment you have a choice. Keep Yoda on your back and the mantra “Do. Or do not. There is no try” in your head, it’ll help. I guarantee it.

 

Further Reading

A day in the life of a retired Navy SEAL commander, MMA coach, podcaster, author , success coach and entrepreneur Jocko Willink:

Jocko Daily Schedule

Jocko Workout Philosophy

 

Journeys

12 Step Jedi Wisdom

“On many long journeys have I gone. And waited, too, for others to return from journeys of their own. Some return; some are broken; some come back so different only their names remain.” – Yoda

 

The biggest party in the galaxy was the victory celebrations after the Battle of Endor. Darth Sidious had fallen, the Sith was vanquished and Anakin was redeemed. There was a wave of optimism that peace would descend on the galaxy and that the New Republic would bring justice and prosperity to all. On Endor, Han and Leia declare their love for each other, Luke celebrates with his friends as the Force Ghosts of his Father and Mentors look on approvingly.  Luke has arrived at the end of the Heroes Journey. The Ewoks dance and the music plays long in to the night. We can assume that celebrations erupted across the galaxy as the news spreads. “They all lived happily after” and the curtain closes on “Return of the Jedi”, the last Star Wars movie.

 

Then What?

 

Life continued and so did the challenges that life brings, even in fiction. The sun rose to another day on Endor. Everyone went back to their lives. Han and Leia married and had a child, Ben Solo. Eventually their marriage fell apart as their personalities clashed and the conflicting demands of their respective roles drove them apart and away from their only child. Ben Solo grew up in the New Republic in the shadow of his famous parents and his heroic uncle Luke Skywalker. A dark shadow also grew inside of Ben.

 

We can assume that Luke Skywalker resurrected the Jedi Order and rebuilt the Temple once Coruscant was liberated. The democratically elected Galactic Senate was also restored. At some point in the period of recovery and renewal ended. Eventually problems arose and new challenges emerged that threatened the hope promised on Endor. Ben chose the path of the Dark Side and joined the First Order. Luke exiled himself, Leia joined a resistance movement and Han returned to smuggling. The galaxy became rife with corruption and internal conflict. Once again the galaxy faced a nefarious threat.

 

In the final chapter, Rey has returned and confronted an evil force which has re-emerged from the shadows to threaten the entire galaxy with tyranny. An epic battle between good and evil takes place and the evil is once again vanquished, for good this time. Ben Solo is redeemed. The order of things is restored and peace settles over the galaxy. The Force is in balance once again. Our heroes return to where it all began decades ago on Tatooine. In the final scene Rey responds to a stranger that she is a “Skywalker”. So ends the final instalment of the final trilogy of Star Wars.

 

Then What?

 

“I am not what happened to me, I am what I chose to become” – Carl Jung

 

There is no such thing as a “Happily Ever After” in real life. The journey never ends. No  matter how well we think things are going or not, the situation will always change. Everything is transient, nothing comes to rest for long. We may come to the end of a novel or a movie but that is the end of the story as told and known to us. Our story never ends. It continues throughout life and in one form or another long after we are gone.

 

In my more than half a century on this world I have started and ended many journeys. I used to think that these chapters were part of some cosmic joke. After all my life had not exactly been a resounding success or anything to be proud of. I always thought that if I fulfilled the expectations of others by settling down, attaining a respectable profession, a fulfilling relationship, meaningful job and the financial security required to live a materially comfortable life I would not only be successful but also happy. On arriving at a measure of each I soon realized that there is always more to be had and that true fulfilment is not wholly dependent on externals that are out of my control. Happiness is not a benchmark set by the standards of others. My alcoholism proved that there was an important spiritual element missing in my life that barred me from ever being “Happy”.

 

“The Cave You Fear to Enter Holds the Treasure You Seek” – Joseph Campbell

 

I have learned that each event in my life and every person I had met played some part in my life Journey. I look back at my life and see my own trilogy unfold as a personal heroes journey of a life before, during and after active alcoholism. At the final turn of events that led to the end of each story within that trilogy I had to confront myself and arrive at some deep personal insight, some meaning. I was forced to stare hard in the mirror and confront myself. I was certainly not a hero but perhaps the journey was heroic. The journey had taught me things about myself, many which I did not want to know or accept but had to in order to move on.

 

When I hit my personal rock bottom I saw my entire life laid out before me, past, present and future. I came face to face with the person I was and was presented with a choice to fall or rise. My ego died that day, for a short moment at least.  I transcended self and saw who I truly was. I knew myself then, I had risen.

 

“Heroes take journeys, confront dragons, and discover the treasure of their true selves” – Carol Pearson

 

When I sobered up I realised I would never drink again. It felt as if the door to that dark life had closed behind me and before me lay a wide world bathed in the light of a new dawn. I walked out, as if naked in to that world, unsure of what was going to happen next but certain that it would never be easy. Life did not magically become a blissful utopia, I did not transcend in to the Force like Luke or Yoda. This was no spiritual end to a journey but only a beginning. I soon found out that life still had its dramas, disappointments and demands. Life was simply moving from one chapter to another in my own Heroes Journey.

 

If we reach enlightenment is there still a “Then What”? Does everything end? The Buddha said that in life we experience the tears of ten thousand joys and ten thousand sorrows. We would not learn, grow and improve without those tears. Adversities are opportunities in disguise. Faults are opportunities for improvement. Recovery is a work in progress. Enlightenment is then not freedom from suffering but the arrival at understanding of the meaning of suffering and knowledge of one’s true self. Enlightenment is not an ending but the beginning of a new story.

 

“The hero’s achievement, in short, is to affirm life.”– Carol Pearson

 

Every story’s end heralds a new beginning. From death life springs. The sun sometimes rises behind clouds and sometimes in full glory, but it does rise to a new day. There is no ending, there is always a “Then What”. The goal of life is only to know thyself and in the end only our names remain.

 

Perhaps, in the final scene, when Rey called herself a “Skywalker”, that was the whole point of “The Rise of Skywalker”. Rey had risen beyond herself and knew at last who she truly was.

 

“To know thyself is the beginning of wisdom.” – Socrates

 

Further Reading

 

Resolve

12 Step Jedi Emotional Sobriety, Self Discipline, Uncategorized

Credit: Lucas Films Ltd

 

“I want to learn the ways of the Force and become a Jedi like my father” – Luke Skywalker ( A New Hope)

 

In a tragic scene which has become one of the most iconic in cinematic history Luke discovers his Uncle and Aunt murdered by the Empire, their bodies outside the ruins of their homestead. Grief quickly turns to fear and hate and in that dark place he finds his resolve and answers the call to adventure.

 

In order to change we must have resolve. We cannot rely solely on others and must be active in our own transformation. Others can act as guides, mentor or coaches but you are the author of your own change. You are the protagonist in your own “Hero’s Journey”.

 

Once you have decided to do something it is important to clarify in your mind why you are doing it. We are often tempted to pursue a new goal and set off before we are prepared or even willing. New year’s resolutions are an example. We give ourselves an ultimatum to change and improve our lives but fail to commit. We lack resolve. As a result we stumble aimlessly forward without a well-defined plan or even any objective. We then falter and abandon the prize we had set ourselves. A goal should always be articulated in a way that it defines the “why” and “what” you are trying to achieve before racing off to achieve it.

 

A study conducted through Scranton University and reported in the Journal of Substance Abuse found that only 19 percent of individuals follow through with New Year’s Resolutions. The main reason is resolutions fail is because they lack the resolve, the commitment and the “why”.  The main reasons alcoholics and other addicts fail to recover is because they fail to admit they have a problem in the first place. Change is the desire but desire alone is not usually going to get you far. Resolve and commitment will.

 

The transtheoretical model of behaviour change states here are six stages people go through on their journey to recovery. This is equally applied to any change in pattern or behaviour that requires concerted effort and commitment.

 

  1. Precontemplation: Denial of a problem contrary to the opinion of others and apparent evidence.
  2. Contemplation: Admission of a problem. Exploration of the costs and benefits of change.
  3. Preparation: You become mentally prepared to change through acceptance.  Surrendering to the process.
  4. Action: Doing the Work. Demonstrating the change you wish to see  even if you have to “fake it till you make it”.
  5. Maintenance: Taking steps every day to ensure that the change becomes embedded over time.

 

Relapse is the sixth stage. Almost everyone who has attempted a change has slipped in to old habits or suffered a setback.  True failure is quitting while there is still the chance to continue on the journey. On the path to being Jedi you will meet many obstacles and challenges. The temptation to fall off the path and quit will sometimes be greater than the effort required to pick yourself up and stay the course. Relapse should not be seen as a failure unless it is terminal.

 

If you had zero problems in your life and everything was perfect there would have no reason to change anything and no point in being here. Likewise if you are not ready to admit you have a problem or are not fully prepared and committed to change then the change you seek will not happen. No magical date will change that. Whether you start on January 1 or any other day makes no difference if you do not have the resolve to start with.

 

So why are you here? Why Jedi Philosophy? What are you seeking to change or improve about yourself? Do you really want to change or does the idea appeal to you more than the work? If you can arrive at answers to these questions then you admit you have a problem and are willing to change. You resolve to improve. Preparation and action usually follows.  For some people this may be self-evident, for others it may be harder to define or articulate. Often it’s easier to keep it simple.

 

Write down one thing you would change about yourself this very moment. Then ask yourself “Why” five times writing down the answer that comes to mind under each line. Dig deep to get to the “Why” to uncover hidden emotions and motivations and become more self-aware. I had a deep seated habit of catastrophic thinking. This affected my relationships and I needed to address it. In the end I had to confront that the way I reacted to adversity was essentially based on fear of punishment or loss that stemmed from a traumatic childhood.

 

What do I want to change?

I want to stop over reacting

Why?

Because it makes me anxious and upset.

Why?

Because I think the worst possible outcome.

Why?

Because I have no control.

Why?

Because I let the fear and anger dictate my reactions.

 

What upset me was not the problems I faced but how I perceived them. I can choose to allow every single bump on the road trip me up or I can accept that things will not always go as I plan. I can decide not to let it affect me that way. The reason I needed to change was because my behaviour was affecting my relationships. I wanted to achieve a higher degree of peace and serenity responding to life in a mindful way rather than reacting to it. By conceptualising it that way I became more invested in addressing that fault and more willing to change.

 

Without having resolve, change is unlikely to be enduring or meaningful, “half measures avail us nothing”. You need to care passionately about the goal and be single-minded about it giving it the focus it deserves. Accept the odds and don’t let people dictate them to you. Have a plan in mind and a destination but do not cling to either as plans change and goals may be unattainable. You need to accept that change is not easy and must be prepared to endure the obstacles, challenges and setbacks that will get in your way.

 

In order to start on the Hero’s Journey, you need to accept your call to adventure. You need to leave the “Ordinary World” behind. To do that you need a reason to be here. You need to answer with full conviction the “Why”. You need to have Jedi Resolve and be prepared to change despite the part of you that fears change and resists. This is your “call to adventure”. Do you answer that call as Luke did?

No Guru

12 Step Jedi Philosophy, Purpose, Uncategorized

“I am neither a scientist nor a philosopher. I’m a Jedi. I don’t have to explain reality. I just have to deal with it.” – Mace Windu

 

People sometimes ask “why Jedi” and I sometimes see people in the Jedi community online debate strongly the qualities and virtues of a “Jedi of quality”. Likewise in the recovery community we often disagree on what constitutes contented sobriety and perfect recovery. Alcoholics in the 12 Step community cannot even agree on whether one can call themselves “recovered” or not. We are left wondering if we are good enough and whether we can arrive at the standard others expect. There are no Gurus here,  your inner voice is the true guide on this path.

 

The point of recovery  is not to reach a state of perfection or even reach some arbitrary standard set by others. Being sober is often enough. Being Jedi is no guarantee of achieving the rank of a Master. Demonstrating the virtues of courage, wisdom, moderation and justice and maintaining a healthy mind, body and soul is often enough.

 

The goal of anything is to improve incrementally over time and hopefully make some difference along the way. There are no Gurus in the recovery program and no true “Jedi Masters” exist in the real world. There are only people doing the best they can for themselves and those close to them. We all want to live a good and meaningful life. We all want to make some positive difference in the world. True heroes are normal, everyday people getting on with life and overcoming obstacles along the way. They are not fictional characters achieving impossible and daring feats.

 

Buddhism has its Bodhisattvas, those who approach enlightenment through dedicated practice but never achieve it in a life time. The Bodhisattvas cultivate good karma for the benefit of all living things on their life journey. Enlightenment, the achievement of “nothingness” may take countless lives to achieve. In the Vedic tradition Gurus also accumulate wisdom and knowledge in the divine. A life time of practice and application may lead to a state of spiritual bliss but enlightenment occurs once in a hundred generations.

 

In the west, Christianity has its rare saints who have achieved oneness with the holy spirit through a life time of dedication, self-sacrifice and piety. Islam and Judaism also have a spiritual ideal that equates to enlightenment.  the Socratic philosophies speak of the Sage who has lived a life unblemished by the concerns and distractions of mere mortals. The Stoic Sage perfected the virtues of courage, justice, moderation and reason in every aspect of life. The state of perfection was known to be unattainable however this did not prevent the Stoic from living those virtues to the highest standards possible. The end result was the attainment of a “good life” through compassion and service to others.

 

Failing to achieve  enlightenment in a lifetime does not make one a bad Buddhist, Hindu, Sikh, Christian, Muslim or Jew. If a person works hard to make life more fulfilling for themselves and others in a meaningful way, regardless of their religion or school of philosophy, they are a being a good human. They are living a good and meaningful life. The saints, prophets, prophets, gurus and sages provide a sign post and a platonic ideal we can all aspire to.

 

Mythology also inspires. Stories describe the human experience as one in which the Hero will pursue some holy pursuit in order to transcend himself and benefit the world in some way.   The Star Wars mythology is no different. All of the main characters are involved in a journey of self-discovery and self realisation. Their actions somehow lead to a better state for themselves and others. The consequence of those actions ripple out across the galaxy. On rare occasions our Jedi hero achieves enlightenment and transcends to the Force. Their journeys inspire us through the medium of fantasy.

 

The goal of the fictional Jedi is to become one with the living Force. In doing so the Jedi arrives at the perfect states of serenity, peace, harmony, knowledge and unity with the Force. In the real world we can only hope to work towards this platonic ideal. The reward is in the work we do to progress down the path. Helping others, becoming better versions of ourselves and in some way making the world a better place, not enlightenment, are the desired outcomes. The goal of the 12 Steps is to stay sober and live a measure of contended sobriety, to grow spiritually and help others on their journey. The common theme is to improve, grow and serve not to become a Guru to others.

 

Philosophy is not about accumulating fancy quotes and devouring literature to satisfy our thirst for knowledge. The point of philosophy is to learn what is useful and apply the knowledge, skills and tools required to improve our lives and the lives of others. We are not here to be “philosophers or scientists”, but to deal with reality and be better versions of ourselves every day. That’s what being Jedi is.

 

Every day is a new chance to rise up and step forward, one foot at a time on this life journey. Eventually we will come to the end of the road and look back on a life that is spent. The question is will you look back at a life lived well? If you do you will have realised your purpose and come to know yourself. That’s more than most people can lay claim to.

 

As we come to the end of another year, ask yourself “Why am I on this journey?”, “Where do I want to go?”, “How can I be the best version of myself?” and “What do I need to do to achieve my goals?”. When you can answer those questions, get to Work.

Thanksgiving

12 Step Jedi Gratitude

 

(Credit: Lucas Films, Disney)

 

“I’m thinking – I owe you one” – Han Solo (deleted scene, “Return of the Jedi”)

 

In “The Return of the Jedi” Luke travels to Tatooine where he rescues Han Solo and Princess Leia and finally defeats Jabba the Hutt and his Mandalorian Bounty Hunter Bobba Fett. Later Han expresses his gratitude to Luke via a comlink as they are departing the planet for separate destinations.  In a deleted scene Han expressed his thanks in person. It is a touching and heartfelt moment between the two great friends and it is a shame they removed it. Han needed to say Thank you more than anything to his friend and the reaction from Luke said it all. Thanksgiving is a spiritual act, it is nourishment for the soul.

 

This Thanksgiving what do you have to be grateful for? Often we find it hard to be thankful. Life can constantly throw up disappointment and frustration. We seem to resolve one problem only to be beset with another. We deal with issues at work, our relationships, finances and health. The list seems endless.

 

We can take steps to re-frame our problems. Every negative has a positive if we look hard enough.

 

Meditate

Life does not have to be about reactivity. Meditating on the negative aspects of life can help in understanding them in context. Is it such a big deal? Would we be much better off if the problem did not exist? Does the problem present opportunities?

 

Accept

Acceptance is a key way to resolve our issues. We have a choice, we can either do something about them or not. Sometimes it is better to act, sometimes it is better to wait and at times, no action is the answer. Denying that the problem exists is no solution as eventually it will force us to face it, possibly under worse conditions.

 

Commitment

Once we have accepted our problems we need to commit to doing something about them now, later or never. Make a decision and stick to it. Adjust and calibrate if needed but resolve to see things out.

 

Act

Take action, whatever it is to resolve the issue. Act mindfully understanding that our actions may have unwanted consequences.

 

Reflect

At the end of Thanksgiving reflect on the positives in your life. List five things you have to be grateful for. Make it a habit every day to remind yourself that there is always five things you can name which you are grateful for. List them in your journal or meditate on them.  I’m sure you can if you try. Some days you will surprise yourself that are more things to be grateful of than you can count on one hand.

 

Journal

If you keep a journal take time to write your list of gratitude down regularly to remind yourself. You can also keep a gratitude diary. Thanksgiving should be every day.

 

“When we offer thanks to God or to another human being, gratitude gifts us with renewal, reflection, reconnection… every time we remember to say ‘thank you’ we experience nothing less than Heaven on earth.” – Sarah Ban Breathnach.

 

Simple Abundance

Han Solo had little to be really grateful for when he met Luke and Ben Kenobi at the  Mos Eisley cantina. The Smuggler was sought out by the Empire and Jabba the Hutt. Han Solo had run out places to run and hide. He had a loyal ally in Chewbacca but no other friends. Over time and through many adventures Han come to know the value of friends and family that he could depend on. He had the undying loyalty and love of his closest friends around him. Solo was not so solo after all. Despite all his losses he had the greatest gift a man could wish for.

 

Today I have a purpose and meaning in my existence, I have a family to care for, a job to do, the sun is shining, more is going well in my life than not and I am sober and there is always hope for a better future.

 

Be grateful every day for what you have. Spend less time on what you don’t.

 

“You simply will not be the same person two months from now after consciously giving thanks each day for the abundance that exists in your life. And you will have set in motion an ancient spiritual law: the more you have and are grateful for, the more will be given you.” -Sarah Ban Breathnach

Hamartia

12 Step Jedi Action, Control, Emotional Sobriety, Resilience

“You want the impossible” – Luke

“That is why you Fail” – Yoda

 

Have you ever experienced soul crushing failure? Did you learn from the experience? Were you able to take that failure and make something of it? Did you resolve to overcome the challenge or did you quit? Did you ever experience Hamartia, a failing so great that it ended you?

 

We all have faults and failings, most are not the fatal and tragic flaws of Hamartia. Our willingness to try and fail and then try again say a lot about how resilient we are. If the “Hero’s Journey” is a metaphor for life, we are all on a personal “Hero’s Journey” then we should not only expect to fail at times, we should embrace it. But we should never quit and succumb to Hamartia.

 

“A failure is not always a mistake, it may simply be the best one can do under the circumstances. The real mistake is to stop trying.” – BF Skinner

 

Hamartia

The ancient Greeks and Romans recognised that failure was essential for success. The myths described the disastrous failures as well as the triumphs of the Hero. What made the stories so compelling then and now was the way in which the Hero was able to surmount their failings and continue on towards the prize. Failure made the Hero more human yet at the same time elevated them to the status of the Gods. The legend was the success that came out of failing.

 

Hamartia (ἁμαρτία) was the Greek word that described something worse that failure. It was to reject the struggle to overcome failure, to refuse the call of the “Hero’s Journey”. Hamartia was to turn one’s back on the Gods and life itself. It was to quit and give in, to lose all Faith. A Hero who could not surmount his tragic fatal flaws and was defeated by them is said to have fallen to Hamartia. They had abandoned the Gods and the Gods had abandoned them. Hamartia is a spiritual and moral failing of the character. A tragic fate worse than death.

 

The ideal but unattainable state of the ancient Greek and Roman philosophers was the achievement of the opposite of Hamartia, being free of error and failing, to be without fault, Anamartetos (αναμάρτητος). The ultimate goal of life, the “Hero’s Journey” is to arrive at this end.

 

“I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” – Thomas Edison

 

 

The Fall and Rise of Skywalker

Luke Skywalker is the Hero Archetype of the Star Wars mythology.  In the original trilogy Luke undertakes the “Hero’s Journey”. There is the call to adventure, doubts and finally commitment. A mentor appears who guides Luke on to the path he must take. Luke makes mistakes and suffers setbacks but learns from them. On Dagobah he learns that nothing is impossible if he is willing. Through his struggles he is able to overcome his Dark Side and confront his darkest fears.

 

Luke arrives at the culmination of his journey. Through struggle, surrender, love and redemption he defeats the Sith and restores balance to the Force. The Hero is now complete. Overcoming failure and fulfilling his mission, Luke is reunited with his loved ones and lives happily ever after. Luke had overcome Hamartia.

 

We know now that the Hero’s Journey did not end for Luke at the closing scenes of “Return of the Jedi”. Luke embarked on many adventures after the Fall of the Empire.  The Journey finally ended on Ahch-To where the aged, embittered, defeated and ultimately failed Jedi Master stood at the final cross road of his life. Did the Hero’s Journey end there in ignominy or did Luke arrive at the glorious destiny intended for him? Did Luke fall in to Hamartia like his father Anakin or did he achieve Anamartetos? To rise is to achieve Anamartetos. 

 

Anakin fell to Hamartia when he surrendered to the Dark Side. The tragedy of the fall was complete in every way.  Luke could have easily fallen in the same trap but learned that while failure may be part of being Jedi, giving in to Hamartia is not. A Jedi can only be judged by how failure is dealt with and whether he or she makes something of it. A Jedi may fail but never gives in to Hamartia.

 

“Success is stumbling from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm.” – Winston Churchill

 

Stumbling Failure

The first four decades of my life seemed to be replete with failings. In many ways, looking back I was a miserable failure, but a stubborn and rebellious one. I had trouble admitting it but that fact was to some extent I had failed in almost every important aspect of my life. My character flaws and failings were too numerous to admit. Yet there I was always in the ring, ready to continue to wrestle with life.

 

There had been some successes. I had survived my troubled childhood and a come out of a short and shameful time in the Army relatively unscathed. It was a miracle that I was not been killed many times during my years of roaming the face of the Earth (Alcohol took me close to that end many times). Outside of the Army I stayed out of prison. I somehow managed to graduate with a degree and in good standing which was nothing short of miraculous considering I rarely finished anything I started.

 

Friendships formed and then floundered. Romantic relationships ignited and burned out quickly. My marriage nearly ended before it had started but persisted thanks mostly to stubborn perseverance. I was a selfish father when my kids were born. Alcohol and selfish pursuit often took precedence in that regard.  My health took turns for the worse yet I continued to drink. I seemed to make a mess of every job I took as my career faltered along. At one point I was staring down the barrel of chronic health issues, a failed marriage, career in tatters, legal issues and bankruptcy.

 

“My basic flaw had always been dependence – absolute dependence – on people or circumstances to supply me with prestige, security and romance. Failing to get them according to my still childish dreams and specifications, I had fought for these things. And when defeat came, so did depression” – Bill W

 

 

Perfection is…..

The irony of the first half of my life was my obsession with perfection and inability to see my own flaws. It pervaded everything I did. My attitude was that if I could not achieve perfection I let the whole thing slide. In my contempt for less and complacency failure was almost always guaranteed. When I did fail it was accompanied with frustration, resentment, blame and a complete lack of self-reflection. I had abandoned the “Hero’s Journey” and had all but fallen to Hamartia. In front of me loomed the dark void.

 

Things turned around for me when I stopped fighting and surrendered my alcoholic problems to a Higher Power. By letting go I decided that failure to that point was OK. There was no changing the past and there was no forcing change. I had to pick up the pieces and with unsteady hands rebuild my life in the way I felt my Higher Power would have me.  The road to success was through a morass of failure. The issue was not whether I failed in my struggles but whether I picked myself up and continued to move forward despite those setbacks. Hamartia, giving in to my fatal flaws was not an option.

 

When success began to happen the fog lifted from my eyes. Perfection was not required, only a willingness to try and never give up mattered. I found that despite a desire to lie down and not get up, I always did. I continued to wrestle with life getting stronger with every day. Persistence and effort paid off. I began to realise the goal of  Anamartetos.

 

“Thoroughly have we seen a person fail who has rarely followed our path” – Alcoholics Anonymous p.58 (The Big Book)

 

Thoroughly

Recovery is not easy. By the grace of a Higher Power I have never returned to alcohol. I often see old habits bubbling to the surface. My shadow self will come to the fore. Perfectionism, uncertainty and fear of failure will hijack attempts to try new things. I sometimes limit myself by staying with what is safe, familiar and certain. In many ways I fear that failing may undermine the foundation on which my sobriety is built.

 

By taking a daily inventory of our failings and faults and admitting to them do we begin to take action to remove them from our lives. We recognise our own inner Hamartia and we keep those fatal flaws at bay. Anger, resentment, complacency and apathy are the four horsemen of the apocalypse we avoid. We do not avoid the struggles and challenges of life. By risking failure and disappointment we open up new pathways to learn and opportunities to improve.

 

Alcoholics can be frustratingly obstinate yet remarkably dogged at the same time. When we apply the same amount of dedication to our recovery as we did to our drinking we seldom fail. Some flaws have an advantage.

 

“Never Give Up” – Luke 18:1

 

Anamartetos

Experiencing Failure is a part of life. Failure is a part of the Hero’s Journey. Mistakes happen and setbacks occur. Nothing ever happens to perfection. There is no smooth sailing the entire journey. Storms will appear on the horizon and sweep in. We will be battered by waves and lashed by wind. Sometimes we will flounder on rocks and be shipwrecked and marooned. From setbacks and catastrophe the Hero emerges stronger, wiser and more resilient.  The transformation allows the Hero to move forward and complete the task and return home victorious. To reject the Hero’s Journey that is in all of us is to reject life. Like Luke we must decide what is possible or not and choose between Hamartia and Anamartetos.

 

Never Give Up!

Dreams

12 Step Jedi Awareness, Dark Side

 

“Dreams pass in time.” ― Obi-Wan Kenobi to Anakin Skywalker

 

Jung wrote “Dreams are pure nature”. Dreams are unfettered, they are wild and reside outside our will. We have no control over our dreams yet dreams affect our lives in tangible ways. Dreams tell us a lot about ourselves if we take the time to think about them. They serve as a conduit for our imagination and serve to assist in the integration of our conscious and unconscious lives.

 

Dreams provide us with symbols that act as cardinal points that guide us on our journey. They reflect the archetypes of the human persona to which we gravitate. To dream is to express our inner desires, hopes and vulnerabilities as well as our fears and regrets. In dreaming we resolve much that happens in our inner world. To dream is to allow us to grow beyond what we are, to become whole as intended.

 

Dreams take me to places and experiences that are alluring or terrifying but always compelling. Their residue lingers through the day long after specific details have vanished from memory. Most days I forget my dreams but when I recall them in startling clarity I search deeply for meaning. Dreams are important because they are a looking glass in to our soul. They tell us more than they conceal.

 

“It’s like… something out of a dream, or, I don’t know.  Maybe I’m just going crazy” – Luke Skywalker

 

 

Drunk Dreams

When I was drinking I rarely recalled my dreams. Some nights I would black out and not dream at all. If I did there would be no recollection. To be drinking and drunk was to live in a sort of a dream. My consciousness was lowered and in my drinking I searched for answers and meanings that did not exist. Illusions of myself and the world would emerge. In my drunken reverie I would imagine heroic triumphs and build myself up to something I was not.

 

My thoughts would also turn dark and loathsome. I would imagine that the world was against me, that I was not worthy. I would fall in to a dark place of self-pity, resentment and anger. In one hour I could swing from the dizzying heights of euphoria to the dark world of depression and fear and back again.  The sobering up the next day was the “waking up” to reality and the consequences of my actions. In my waking state my mind would torment me with glimpses of my drunken spree as if recalling a nightmare. I would recall things I had done and said with horror.

 

“Anakin, you must break through the fog of lies the Jedi have created around you” – Palpatine

 

The Fog

After a while it seemed as if my waking time and my dreams had merged in to one. I would ponder a disturbing dream I had had the night before. Flashes of faces, voices, laughter and lights would appear in my mind and I would soon realize that the images represented a memory, not a dream. I would later recall something about a drinking spree and ask a friend about it only to learn that my recollection was the product of a dream and had never happened. Dreams and reality became confused.

 

To live in alcoholism was to live in a twilight world, a fog, that blurred dreams with reality. As time passes the connection between body, mind and soul breaks down. As the important self-regulating conduit of dreams is taken hostage by alcohol we lose grip on reality and insanity begins to creep in.

 

“It was only a dream.” – Anakin Skywalker

 

Oneiros

Dreams are harbingers of calamity and disaster in Mythology as well as warnings and prophecies . The Greeks personified dreams as Oneiros. Gods and other mythical creatures spoke to heroes through the Oneiros. They were warned of impending danger and guided by the benevolent Gods. In Norse mythology dreams were seen as harbingers of fate for both mortals and Gods. The Universe and all creation was said to be the dream of the Slavic God Svarog. One day Svarog will awaken from his slumber and all existence shall end.

 

In the Old Testament Joseph the son of Jacob foresaw his own future in dreams and later interpreted dreams for the Pharaoh forewarning him of impending disasters so that the Egyptians could prepare. In the New Testament angels visited Joseph in a dream and foretold that his wife Mary would bear the prophesied Messiah. Joseph was later warned in a dream to take the baby Jesus in to Egypt to escape the slaughter of the infants by King Herod.

 

“I had a dream I was a Jedi.” ―Anakin Skywalker

 

I had a Dream

In Star Wars visions and dreams often appear to the characters as a warning or prophecy of danger. The Jedi took notice of their dreams. The Force interacted with the Jedi through their dreams. Ahsoka Tano dreamed of an assassination attempt on Padmé Amidala and was able to foil the plot. On the other dimension world of Mortis, Anakin was shown a vision of Darth Vader and the Death Star in a dream. The dream showed Anakin that he stood on a precipice. The vision revealed his future should he fall to the Dark Side. Yoda was forced to face his shadow in order to transcend. Through a dream induced by the Force Yoda wass confronted by visions and was able to rise above his fears, hopes and ultimately his Dark Side.

 

All Clone Troopers had nightmares. They dreamed of the horrors of war and possibly of an unknown future when the Clones would turn on the Jedi and massacre them under Order 66.

 

“The Missions, the Nightmares… they’re finally…. over” – “Fives” last words

 

Nightmares

Anakin Skywalker often dreamed about loss and despair. As the years passed the dreams became darker. The dreams reflected his inner demons and fears. The potential future was manifested in Anakin’s dreams. On Naboo he dreamed of his mother’s death and the visions sent him to Tattooine where his nightmare became a reality. As Anakin began to be drawn tighter in to Palpatine’s web on Coruscant he began to dream of Padmé suffering in childbirth. She would call out to him and scream as she writhed in agony, dying. Anakin felt powerless to act to prevent these tragedies from unfolding.  Desperate to save his wife he turned to the Dark Side and his actions led to his worst nightmares being realized.

 

The fall of Anakin and his transformation in to Darth Vader was the start of a long nightmare from which there was no awakening. In his sleep, Padmé would visit him and he would fight for his soul. Darth Vader would awaken and push the memories of his past behind him. Dreams were a reminder of the dead past. Every waking moment was a nightmare of torment and pain, eased only by a lust for power and revenge. Darth Vader would have dreaded going to sleep for in his dreams lay the residue of who he really was. The desolate soul of Anakin was trapped deep within him, locked in a nightmare he could not escape.

 

“Sleep, all life is a dream.” ― Jedi Master Kit Fisto

 

Waking Up

Alcoholism is a bad dream that can last for decades. There are brief moments of wakefulness  however the allure of the dream world of alcohol constantly beckons us. Reality is too painful to endure sober. We fall in to alcohols embrace and find that the fantasy we seek does not exist.

What exists is a meaningless and nihilistic realm where the body, mind and soul withers in a form of dream purgatory. We feel a sense of foreboding as if some calamity awaits. Alcohol affects REM sleep so we never get enough good sleep and our thoughts are scattered as a result. Existence soon becomes a grey netherworld that is neither fully awake or fully asleep.

 

“Soon will I rest, yes, forever sleep. Earned it I have” – Yoda

 

Sleep

Sobriety brings restful sleep and dreams I love going to sleep so much so that I look forward to the end of the day and retiring to bed. The morning comes without a hint of regret. Peaceful sleep has ended and dreams evaporate like an early morning mist. I get up to face the new day, my mind is clear and body feels rested. I can remember my dreams. Some make more sense than others. I never ignore them.

 

Mostly my dreams are good. The dreams show me aspects of the past and present, sometimes I believe there are glimpses of the future. Sometimes I dream that I am drinking again. I relive in my dreams the same comic tragedies that played out when I was drunk. Yet they are worse. When I awake I do so with a clear head. There is a sense of relief that it was only a dream. I am still sober. The drinking dreams are mere echoes of the past. They serve as a reminder of what it was like, what happened and how things changed. They also show how things might have been or could be. I keep my feet planted in reality now, my dreams are my own, I learn from them but they do not control me like they did Anakin.

Betrayed

12 Step Jedi Action, Community, Compassion, Service

“Have they asked you to betray the Jedi code” – Palpatine

“I felt a great disturbance in the Force, as if millions of voices suddenly cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced. I fear something terrible has happened.” – Obi-Wan Kenobi

 

Have you ever been betrayed? How did it make you feel? Were you angered by the actions of the person you trusted? Did you berate yourself for giving them your trust and resolved never to do it again? Did you grieve the act and the loss of trust that came from it? Were friendships and illusions of trust shattered?

Betrayal is such a terrible thing. Betrayal feels like a stab to the heart but it does not always kill but it does burns the soul and hardens the heart.

In the last ten days I have come to realize that to suffer betrayal is to suffer the five stages of grief. There is denial, anger, bargaining, depression and finally acceptance. I have felt them all. The thing is, the betrayal did not happen to me. I was not betrayed. I don’t even know the people who were betrayed and have never been to the place where it happened. Their betrayal is the worst kind, because they are dying from it. It still feels as if it happened to me and to those close to me such is the insidiousness of the betrayal.

I’ll explain later.

 

“They will betray you, just as they betrayed me.” – Palpatine to Anakin

 

We have all been betrayed at one time or another. Some of us have been betrayed by our parents, lovers, friends, partners, workplace, religious leaders as well as our government. I know I’ve been betrayed at least once by all of the above. To describe it all in detail would fill a book. It should have made me bitter and unable to trust anyone. For many years it did and my grief lasted that long. I coped from the pain and anger of it with alcohol.

 

“You were supposed to destroy the Sith, not join them. You were supposed to bring balance to the force, not leave it in darkness” – Obi-Wan Kenobi

 

Mythology teaches many lessons. The stories may be fantastic and far from reality but they hold a mirror up to the foibles, follies, failures, tragedies and triumphs of the human condition. Betrayal is an act which has a special place in our collective mythology.

The myths are brimming with betrayal. The Norse God Odin was a God of betrayal as was Loki. The Greek God Dolos inspired betrayal. The Slavs had Czernobog and the Hindus have Vibishana in their epic myths of betrayal. People often complain being betrayed by God. Yet betrayal is a very human trait.

Jason of the Argonaughts was married to Medea and betrayed her for another. In return she did the unspeakable and slew their children. The war between Sparta and Troy started when Helen betrayed her betrothed, Menelaus for Paris.

Prometheus defied the will of Zeus and during creation gave humans the ability to make fire and use free will. This betrayal enraged Zeus, who creating Pandora gifted her to Prometheus’s brother Epimetheus. Pandora carried with her a box that Zeus had filled with every evil and misfortune that she would inevitably release upon the Earth.

 

“Vader betrayed and killed your Father” – Obi-Wan Kenobi

 

In Star Wars there are many acts of betrayal. The relationship between the Sith Master and apprentice led to eventual betrayal. Dooku betrayed Darth Maul and Asajj Ventress. Darth Sidious betrayed Darth Plagueis and killed him as he slept.

Lando Calrissian turned over his friend Han Solo to the Bounty Hunter Boba Fett. The Mandalorians were betrayed by their own Prime Minister who handed the seat of power to Darth Maul. Finally, Anakin betrayed the Jedi Order by turning to the Dark Side and setting a chain of events that would lead to the destruction of the Jedi, the exile of survivors, the fall of the Republic and the rise of the Sith.

Obi-Wan Kenobi betrayed Anakin on the lava flows of Mustafar leaving him for dead. Later he told Luke that Vader had betrayed and killed his father.

 

 “Their betrayal will be dealt with. After you have killed all the Jedi in the Temple, go to the Mustafar system. Wipe out Viceroy Gunray and the other Separatist leaders. Once more, the Sith will rule the galaxy, and we shall have peace.” – Darth Sidious to Anakin

 

In our reality we see betrayal played out on the stage of life. Recently civilized nations, in particular America, chose to abandon and betray their true friends and staunchest allies in the Middle East, the Kurds. The ethnic and religious minorities of that place so far away are now at the mercy of a merciless invader, Turkey and its Jihadi proxies.

The reasons are purely geopolitical. The American, British and French soldiers that fought alongside their Kurdish counterparts are still devastated by the betrayal. They were there to safeguard the people from genocide. They grieve as I grieve. No one should be left behind like that especially the Kurds who sacrificed and suffered so much in the fight against ISIS. I learned this as a soldier and believe it as a Jedi.

 

“You’re with him. You’ve betrayed me! You brought him here to kill me!” – Anakin to Padme

 

We can now watch the tragedy of betrayal play out in real time as if we were watching the fall of Mandalor or the purge of the Jedi by Darth Sidious and the brutal ascendancy of the Empire. Genocide and ethnic cleansing. The blood on the streets, the destruction, death and fleeing masses are real. They are the victims of betrayal. How can one not grieve? How can they ever forgive? Why did it happen?

Still the people we let down, do forgive us.

 

“Forgive me, Master.” – Anakin

 

The Bible tells us that Jesus was betrayed for 12 pieces of silver by Judas. I wonder what went through the mind of Judas. How did Jesus feel? The Bible says that Jesus kissed Judas and forgave him. This drove Judas to insanity of regret and despair at his actions, so much so that he hanged himself from a tree. Joseph, the son of Jacob was sold into slavery by his jealous brothers. Taken to Egypt he became a friend and advisor to the Pharaoh and rose to the the rank of Vizier. Later he reunited with his brothers and forgiving them sent for his people in Canaan to live in Egypt till a famine had passed.

Forgiveness opens the door which leads to freedom from the pain of betrayal. We must be willing to let go of the past if we expect others to accept our amends. It is the path to peace and serenity. To do otherwise is to keep a deep resentment alive with us. We can never be free if we do. You can really only betray yourself.

 

“I will not betray the Republic” – Anakin

 

There is a Kurdish saying “Berxwedan Jiyane” which means “Struggle is Life”. After centuries of suffering they know that the price of freedom is to struggle. I hope our friends and allies in North-East Syria forgive us for what we have done. They have been betrayed and proven once again that they have “no friends but the mountains”.

It is not the first time they have been betrayed. Each time they forgive and put renewed trust in those who cannot be trusted. My heart goes out to them. There is nothing more I can do but pray and hope for a miracle.

In betrayal there are no winners, only tears and regret. Can you betray the Jedi Code? Betray none least of all yourself.

#RiseUp4Rojava

https://riseup4rojava.org/

 

Don’t Panic

12 Step Jedi Awareness, Emotional Sobriety, Faith

“They’ll panic? I’m about to panic!” – Ahsoka Tano

“Don’t Panic” – Douglas Adams “The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy”.

 

In a ‘Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy” Arthur Dent is mostly oblivious to the rest of the world and its troubles. One day he wakes up to find his house is about to be demolished to make way for a highway bypass. The local council had posted the plans and somehow Dent had failed to take notice. As this was unfolding a Vogon star ship had entered Earth’s orbit and declared to the world that the planet would be destroyed to make way for an intergalactic hyperspace bypass. Pandemonium ensues and everyone panics.

With the help of his enigmatic friend, Ford Prefect, Arthur Dent manages to get off Earth before it blows up. Still wearing his night gown and pajamas from the morning Arthur Dent reluctantly sets off an intergalactic adventure that takes him across and to the end of the Universe and the beginning. The adventure begins with the default clause of the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy; “Don’t Panic!”.

 

“Don’t Panic. It’s the first helpful or intelligible thing anybody’s said to me all day.” – Douglas Adams “The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy”.

 

The Second Arrow

Alcoholics are catastrophic thinkers. We tend to imagine the worst possible outcome in all scenarios. An argument is the end of a relationship, a reprimand at work is as good as being fired and a letter from the government or IRS is a herald of financial disaster. We are the worst for dreaming up the worst case scenarios.

The Buddha alluded to catastrophic thinking when he spoke of the “second arrow”. The first arrow was what actually happened to us, the true cause of the suffering. The second arrow was the event magnified within our own minds. The suffering is worsened by our own emotional and irrational reaction to it. The first arrow is out of our control, the second arrow is within it.

 

“Would it save you a lot of time if I just gave up and went mad now?” – Douglas Adams “The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy”.

 

Worst Case Scenarios

When I was a child I would shake in my shoes when called to the principal’s office. I was terrified of imagined and realized punishments my Father would inflict before they happened. No matter what the reason, I still feel unease when summoned by my boss at work for a private chat in his office.

In school at the height of the cold war I was named the “Doomsday Prophet” for my dire predictions that a nuclear holocaust was about to happen. It never did.

Never one to relax I was constantly on edge in the Army believing that each new day would herald more misery, corporal punishment and probably some terrible end. I listened to rumors and digested the news with alarm and consternation. My body was a ball of nervous anxiety. Fortunately my training conditioned my reflexes. To feel fear is normal but to react with panic in combat is unforgivable. .

 

“He felt that his whole life was some kind of dream and he sometimes wondered whose it was and whether they were enjoying it.”  – Douglas Adams “The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy”.

 

Panic Junkie

I became drawn to calamity and chaos like a moth to fire. I was addicted to anxiety and panic. Events in the world seemed to mirror what was going on inside me. With a sense I could make a difference I set off on a global bar crawl to set things right. I traveled from the famine of East Africa to air raid sirens and religious hatred in the Middle East, the fraternal war and ethnic bloodletting in Bosnia to the tribal and racial violence in South Africa.

I washed up amidst the “colorful” poverty of the Favelas and the burning season in the Amazon in Brazil. The memories play back like the frames of a movie reel. Within that collage of noise and color I remember the haze of alcohol and an undertow of fear and self loathing.

 

The Burning Issues

Something I saw in Brazil affected me. The Amazon touched my soul. The morning mist shimmering in the early light as it hung low on a still river. I remember the call of macaws as they passed majestically over-head. The dim world of the forest was silent but for the call of birds and spider monkeys complaining in the canopy high above. The forest was vast and it had the power to utterly possess me. It had the primordial and divine peace that I yearned in my own life.

The smell of smoke and the haze hung over the forest as fires burned far away. The forest was being pushed back by ranchers and gold miners who were locked in a struggle with rubber tappers and Indians. I was told in 1994 the forest would be gone in twenty years. This alarmed me.

The forest burned. The world was being destroyed and I felt growing anger and alarm. The more I realized I was powerless to make a difference the greater my resentment grew and fed my anxiety.

 

“If there’s anything more important than my ego around, I want it caught and shot now.” – Douglas Adams “The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy”.

 

 

Did you ever hear the tragedy of Skywalker?

Irrational fear aroused within Anakin a sense of panic at a destiny he could not control. Fears were magnified in his mind and became catastrophes he could not control. The need to change and control that destiny drove him to abandon reason and allow his shadow self to dominate him.

Anakin allowed irrational fear and catastrophic thinking to bypass a life time of Jedi training. Objectivity, reason, rational decision making and sound judgement were replaced by the darker side of emotion. Emotion rather than reason owned Anakin. This ultimately led Anakin to the dark side.

 

“I’d far rather be happy than right any day.” – Douglas Adams “The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy”.

 

 

F*k Everything and Run

Sobriety has taught me that any decision based on fear and panic may help in the short term but long term the consequence often negate those positives. In the past I would panic and make rash decisions and do something I would later regret. Often I would say “F*k it” and run away from my responsibilities. I would get drunk.

In hindsight I would realize that these actions incited by fear, anger and ultimately catastrophic thinking had done nothing for me and usually it only made matters worse. Why did I put myself through that? Everything turned out fine.

After witnessing the burning season in Brazil I entered University and studied environmental science. Two decades later I work in conservation and observe with alarm how fear and panic has hijacked rational and reasoned discourse. Short sighted decisions are made with little regard to far reaching consequences. I’m pleased to see that the Amazon is still there. There are monumental problems in the world but I have faith and believe in hope.

 

“For a moment, nothing happened. Then, after a second or so, nothing continued to happen.” – Douglas Adams “The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy”.

 

Know Faith No Fear

My life was one of reactivity, catastrophic thinking and panic. It’s strange that until you recognize it in others you don’t recognize it in your self. It took me to get sober and work on myself to realize how irrational many of my fears were and how catastrophic thinking ran my life.

Every time I feel the second arrow hit I pull it out immediately. Let the first arrow hurt for a bit but don’t make it worse by imagining something that is not real. Remember the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy; “Don’t Panic”. In other words have faith, not fear.

 

“So this is it, we’re going to die” – Douglas Adams “The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy”.

 

The House is on Fire

I don’t want you to panic. The house is not burning down. The world is not coming to an end. There is no reason to abandon reason. If things are not right, work to fix it and put it right. Do what is within your power to do and let go of the rest.

Avoid jumping to conclusions, silence the doomsayer within and never listen to doomsday prophets. Use your own judgement and think hard before deciding.

Study and be prepared to change your view when evidence suggests otherwise. Avoid falling for group-think and hysteria.

Recognize and avoid the mob fueled by dogma and anger. You were given the faculties to make up your own mind and think for yourself. In other words, be a little like Arthur Dent.

 

Don’t Panic

Panic and catastrophic thinking is not for us. Jedi are free thinkers we respect and acknowledge our emotions but we do not react to them mindlessly. We use our brains to decide what is true while remaining tolerant of the views of others. Gathering the facts as they are, we choose how best to act in a way that is applicable, beneficial, practical and positive.

Whatever you do Don’t Panic.

 

Epilogue

“And then, one Thursday, nearly two thousand years after one man had been nailed to a tree for saying how great it would be to be nice to people for a change, a girl sitting on her own in a small café in Rickmansworth suddenly realized what it was that had been going wrong all this time, and she finally knew how the world could be made a good and happy place. This time it was right, it would work, and no one would have to get nailed to anything.” – Douglas Adams “The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy”.